As International Men’s Day rolls around the corner, it’s a
good time to spread awareness about men’s mental health as well as the aspects
we often overlook about it. Many men shy away from asking for personal or
professional help for their mental health for various reasons. Some of the most
common underlying beliefs can be reflected in some variation of the common
notions that men have regarding seeking mental health help as reported in a recent
survey:

• “I can deal with my own problems”

• “I do not wish to be a burden to anyone”

• “I do not want to appear weak”

• “I’m used to figuring things out on my own”

• “I’m too embarrassed”

• “There’s negative stigma around this kind of thing”

• “I have no one to talk to”

It can be interpreted as a sign of weakness, a challenge to
their feeling of masculinity, and more such reasons which lead to the
underreporting of mental health issues. We often think of women as the biggest
victims of patriarchy, but the reality is that a system like patriarchy is no
kinder to men in the country than to any other gender: the pressure of “being
in charge”, being masculine and fitting the stereotypical man’s role is a
burden every boy is groomed towards and every man is implicitly expected to
take on – whether they like to or not, whether they think it is fair or not,
whether they are capable to or not. Indeed, with the fluctuating job market and
the unemployment rates skyrocketing, many an eligible and competent young man
is forced into the shoes of breadwinner without having the economic means to do
so.

With this and so many other things to worry about, who has the time, money
or energy to go for therapy? Add to that a dose of some good old-fashioned
stigma and we are creating a mental health situation for men across the country
that is neither healthy nor helpful.

When it comes to men’s mental health, what often gets
overlooked is the fact that due to social taboo, men’s mental health issues
often go undocumented as well as unreported, which means that men don’t often
seek out treatment for problems they are facing. Instead, we see a number of
men turn to other methods of coping and stress relief for their stress, anxiety
and depression. These coping mechanisms are not necessarily conducive and
usually have negative side-effects of their own. Aggression and displacement
can be used as defense mechanisms, or else the use of substances or other poor
habits. Let’s take alcohol use for instance: According to a National Mental
Health Survey, the prevalence of alcohol use disorders in males was 9% as compared
to 0.5% in females.

“Be a man” and “Man up” are not the answers. Let’s start
talking about men’s mental health, normalize expressing emotions freely and
going for therapy, challenge outdated social mores, and give men a voice in an
area they have been deprived for fear of rejection and mockery.

Acknowledging
we are all human, and we each need support at different stages regardless of
gender is the first step. Let’s not overlook that.